i want to write relationships that are complicated.

i want to write the on-again-off-again relationships. i want the screaming matches and the cancelled dates and the hurt feelings and the second guesses and second chances. 

i want to write people who completely shake up each other’s daily routine and flip their entire world on its axis. i want them to drive each other crazy and question why they bother sticking around and then remember the way their partner laughs or see them in a moment of vulnerability that tells them ‘this is is why i stay. this is why i love you.‘ 

i want to write relationships with struggles. with class differences and financial divide. two people who are so completely different they somehow complete each other. i want the jealousy and the feelings of inadequacy that goes with it. 

i want to write people who aren’t afraid to be honest with their partner. who aren’t afraid to say ‘yeah you’re being an asshole’ followed by ‘but i still love you, you idiot.’

i want the first time they see their partner cry and the morning after their first intimate night when everything feels so right.

i want people who get so used to one another that they stop going the extra mile. i want the ‘you don’t make the effort because you already have me’ argument.

i want relationships that challenge each other to be better people and make each other question their beliefs and moral compass. 

but most of all, i want to write relationships that are real. that make you feel something. i want to go on the emotional rollercoaster right along with them.

that’s what i want.